Bienvenido A Miami!!!!!

  
I'm trading in the coyote fur lined Coach coat and Stuart Weitzman winter boots for the All Saints Sparkle Mirelle bikini and Tabitha Simmons sandals. (Yes hoodrats there is more to life than Gucci and Christian Louboutin). The REAL bagels and REAL pizza slices for Cobb salads and Cubano sandwiches (minus the pickle please).  I'm moving to Miami. In approximately 161 days my zip code will go from 11234 to 33119. From the county of Kings to Dade County. 
I can put my french manicured finger on the exact day that I got the Florida fever. It was that day back in '98 when I received my acceptance letter from the University of South Florida. I just KNEW I was gonna be in Florida from that day on and become America's #1 Marine Biologist even though I didn't even know how to swim. Until the day after when the "stomach virus" that I thought I had for a week turned out to be the confirmed sign of the fact that I was 6 weeks pregnant. Oh. OK. I can still go to Florida and go to school and get a job and take care of my baby and maintain at least a 3.5 GPA all on my own. Girl please !!! Reality set in and I knew that I had to be smart. My head and heart told me that I needed to have my child and stay in NY for the time being where both my baby and I would be comforted and supported by the never ending love that my family would give us. Instead I went to John Jay and studied forensic psychology. I worked part time all throughout college. Never once did my parents ask me for rent money. Never once did my sisters ask me to pay them for watching my Noodle while I worked or went to school. Despite our great lives here in NY there was always a part of me curious about Florida. 
My fam and I spent summers in Orlando. I loved everything about Florida. Except the bugs. And lizards. Last summer my biz partner, some friends and I went down to Miami (my 2nd time being there) and we had one of the best times of our lives. I know that every night for me in Miami won't consist of a meal on Ocean and what feels like a scene from a music video at King of Diamonds but I do know that it's part of my calling to be there. I'm a little nervous. But I've never been one to bitch out of anything just because I get a little nervous. Noodle said to me the other day, " I'm not worried about moving because wherever we are people think we're awesome." Noodle and I have no family in Miami. We have no friends down there either. What we do have is each other and our NY swag. G*d willing everything I set out to do in Miami will come to fruition. I plan on launching my underwear line out there as well as starting up my bikini line with my family. After that, I will meet a hot Cuban man with tatts and dimples and we'll get married and have a daughter named Azul Hibiscus (in honor of the Hispanic roots and my 4th cousin 3 times removed Beyonce). If for some G*d foresaken reason things don't go as planned I will stalk Rick Ross and DJ Khaled until they hire me to be their permanent video chick. 
I hope Dade County is ready because my demeanor, accent and attitude is about to let em know real quick. I am born and bred in NY and I am both book and street smart. I am a force to be reckoned with and will survive in whatever environment I'm placed in. No matter where I end up, *insert Jay Z voice* I'm Brooklyn till I die. In this case, I'll just be rockin my NY Yankees fitted on the beach. Who's mad?

The Demise of The Black King

de·mise

   [dih-mahyz]  Show IPA noun, verb, -mised,-mis·ing.

noun

1.

death or decease.

2.

termination of existence or operation: the demise of the empire

Some of you black "men" kill me. Calling yourselves kings when some of you are nothing but court jesters. Some of you are kings in training. A prince maybe. Not yet a king. 

So quick to be judgmental and call women bitches, sluts, hoes, etc. but ya'll remain the main reason why black homes are broken.

Coming off like an emotional bitch. Even more so than a female.  A black man is supposed to carry themselves like a king - not a princess. That's the role of your daughter until she herself becomes a queen. But some of you have walked out on your princess as well as the queen that carried her so you know nothing of which I speak. And if you have children with more than 1 woman and aren't married to any of them the women you lay with aren't the only irresponsible whores in the equation. You are too. The demise of the black king. 

And ya'll are bitches b/c your father wasn't around or if he was he was good for nothing. So now you are him and the cycle continues. 

You thirst to get a record deal but don't have the same thirst to be (on the path to being) the solid leader of your black family. Running to a studio but won't step foot into a library. 

Standing in line for hours for a new pair of sneakers but too proud to stand in line for a job application,  job interview or financial aid. The very epitome of a cooned out ape ass nigger. The demise of the black king. 

You won't exercise your paternal / parental rights and take a female to court to ensure that you see your child. Instead you'll complain about the "bitch" and allow your child to grow up with another man or sometimes even a woman as their other father figure. You'll impregnate another female without making things right with your first born. The demise of the black king. 

You glorify what you are not. You want to be a 'Godfather' character. 'Scarface' is one of your favorite movies. LOL Comical and sad. The demise of the black king. 

You allow your fears to prevent you from building a solid, genuine bond with a queen. It's easier to walk away from things that exude a challenge. Because you're a scary ass bitch. Kings don't run away from conflict. They face and conquer them. Letting excessive pride get in the way and being stubborn is not the characteristic of a real leader. Whipping out your dick every moment to show people how big it is is not the characteristic of a leader. If your dick is that big its already visible to those of us that are paying attention. Real leaders allow a trusted few to see their weaknesses. Real leaders know when to work on their areas of weakness. Real leaders don't allow outside forces like bitter concubines or fair weather friends to infiltrate their unions with a real queen. Real kings don't allow their link between them and those that will help them face the world to be broken. The demise of the black king.

It's disappointing. Because even though a good number of you are decent, there is often still a minor residue of bitchassness left behind by your actions or in some cases inaction(s). 

Grown man body, adolescent mentality. The demise of the black king. 

Big dicks, big wallets, big egos. Still not a king. 

If you're a Black man of a certain age and you're cool with being a prince I will not judge you, brotha. But know this - a prince is pushed out of a queen's vagina. A king is invited into one. 

But that's just my opinion.